Final Farewell

 This project has been a rollercoaster. Emotionally, mentally.

It was super difficult for me originally, as I feel like I was challenging myself too much, and setting expectations I could not meet. 

Once I finally settled on an idea, it was hard to get the ball to keep rolling. I feel like the ball was super heavy and oddly lumpy, because it would NOT ROLL. 

I think my biggest mistake in this project, which won't be coming as a shocker to anyone who knows me, was time management. I could have saved myself a lot of stress if I had been more efficient and just focused my brain for specific amounts of time in advance, instead of doing everything later and in sporadic bursts.

However, I am still proud of the project I created. I had so much fun filming it, and it was super cool to see the shots come to life and the editing tie everything together. I am currently about to end my last season of soccer, so it was nice to do this at the same time. It feels like a nice close to things. 

Speaking of closing, this is the end of my blogs. I will be graduating and off to college soon. Blogger, it has been a pleasure being at your service. To my millions of fans reading my blogs, I love you all dearly. I wish you well. Stay safe!

I'M DONE!

 Hi guys! The moment we have all been waiting for is here...

After weeks of hard work...

Blood, sweat, and lots of tears...

I give to you...

The Goalie.

Short film

Postcard

Social Media

Thank you for listening to me rant on these blogs. It has been an honor. 

I hope you enjoy!

critical reflection

  For my portfolio project, I created a short film entitled “The Goalie.” My short film centers around a student-athlete whose life revolves around soccer and who is preparing for college acceptances. 

This piece was relevant to me because as a senior who plays soccer, I too felt the pressure of wanting to create a career out of my passion. At the beginning of the project, I really struggled to come up with an idea. I desperately wanted an original, never-before-seen concept that would blow everyone away, but I kept coming up short. The first couple of weeks were particularly slow for me, as this idea did not come to mind. My teacher then suggested to stick to what I know- a narrative I can understand or relate to. After this discussion, endless possibilities opened up for me once I settled on the sports genre. I began to research sports films and decided I didn’t necessarily enjoy the cheesy, motivational ones. A piece that inspired me was “The Lonely Goalkeeper,” which I saw featured in New York Times’ 15 minute short films, in an assignment for this class earlier in the year. After watching that, I gravitated towards the position of goalkeeper as a subject for my film as I think that the amount of pressure that is on them throughout the game is tremendous, and it would be interesting to see how that pressure would affect someone. I also have been dealing with college acceptances, so this piece felt comfortable to write and bring to life. So my target audience was defined pretty well, being late high school-aged student-athletes. Having such a specific target audience made it much easier for me to create all three components.  Gender, social class, and others don’t make a difference- but athletes about to graduate can relate to this film heavily, and that issue is represented well; not everyone will make it into college.

 In terms of actual production, I definitely struggled with my time management. This was an issue I had in my AS level project, and I believed I made some improvement. However, I was often overwhelmed by the fact that I felt so behind in the process that I just pushed myself further back. I stressed over topics that could have been solved with some simple brainstorming sessions. Far too often I set up unrealistic expectations with myself and become frustrated that they do not work in the way I wanted them to. This limited the development of my plot, and it didn’t end up delving as deep into the personal aspect of the story as I had planned. That being said, I enjoyed the way my short film turned out. Being so reliant on a character-driven story, I wanted to make it as visually driven as possible. For example, I loved the shot I have that begins with Alex’s friend dribbling the ball at a midshot, following her and quickly panning left to follow the shot she takes on goal that Alex blocks. Or, the composition of the shots with the friend shooting, keeping the ball and the goal directly in the middle third. I think my target audience will appreciate my use of quicker-paced editing to represent the quick pace and intensity of the game, as well as the use of rock music. I wanted to bring to life the passion of the sport. Using my Steadicam helped give the footage a little edge, but I wish I had thought more in advance to maybe have brought some different lens or perhaps a mic. The postcard also embodies the genre well, as my research in my blogs showed several sports films posters featuring the main character engaging in said sport, like the Rocky films. I got a cool action shot of her but kept the rest of the postcard youthful to appeal to my target audience. The official Instagram page, more than anything, appeals to the high school-aged audience. The posts are meant to engage comments and have interaction with one another. The diction is focused towards people my age and I tried to implement ‘relatable’ student-athlete content. In the highlights of the page, I also included some polls for the audience to interact with. That being said, I wish I had put in more time to the social media, to have created more posts and come up with more ideas that I know I personally would have liked to see on an account. I think I focused so much on the actual short film that I didn’t prioritize this component as much as I should have. 

I think I created a good brand, one that represents my target audience well, and moreover shows the struggles of the athlete and how common they are. Like I mentioned previously, my film represents an important event in athlete’s lives. So many people work so hard their entire lives, building up to this one moment, only to get rejected from the school and team of their dreams. It is a crushing experience, as not only do people hustle academically for it, but in their sport as well, for years and years. It takes determination and drive, but sometimes that in itself is not enough. I believe that I represented this situation fairly well, though the film doesn’t show much of the afterthought. It does show the initial pain, regret, and anger of the rejection. The clips in red represent Alex’s complete and utter frustration with herself, as she replays all the moments she could have done better, wondering if that would have changed something. This is representing self-doubt, something many athletes struggle with. I wanted those who relate to my story to feel less alone, as it can be difficult to see others succeed around you when you couldn’t, like the main character’s teammate does. 

Overall, I am pleased with the work I have presented for my portfolio project. I think I developed exactly the brand I was intending to, representing my target audience and their issues well. While I wish I would have spent more quality time preparing and executing some components, I think it came together nicely. I definitely could improve my next projects through time management and efficiency. However, I am still proud of my work.

editing!

Hey everyone! We're finally reaching the end of this portfolio project!

So I have been editing my short film and I am very pleased with the results. I was a little stressed at the idea of attempting any new software, so I decided to go with ol' reliable- iMovie <3

iMovie worked perfectly for what I needed. It was super easy to edit quickly and make concise cuts. I also love the way it turned out with music. I was able to find music I liked from the iMovie app, so no need to worry about any copyright issues! I also incorporated that red filtering I mentioned earlier, and I think it looks pretty cool. 

I also found that I did not come up short with footage. I had more than enough actually, and very refined I finish at about 4 minutes and 45 seconds, which is good!

I also created the postcard, but no spoilers for you. See you soon! :)

filming!

 hi guys! hope you are all doing well! 

I filmed today! Finally! Total weight of my shoulders! 

I think that it went super well. I had my main actress, Alexandra Jones, come to the fields with me to shoot the soccer scenes. I decided to go after school rather than before my practice later at night for better lighting. Plus, the fields are always empty at that time anyway. My other teammates Stefania Tasayco and Iliana Mantjos came to help too. Stef will be in the film as well, she will help my goalie train. Originally, I just wanted it to be Jones, but I think having someone else with her in the film will create some cooler shots. Especially action shots.

It was super hot out, so I decided instead of having my goalie train in her uniform long sleeve shirt, I would just have her in her short sleeve practice jersey. I think it looks fine still.

Then, we went to record the indoor portion of the scenes and the end. It was easier to shoot here now that I didn't have the heat punching me in the face. I think overall this went well also, after reviewing the footage.

I am a little bit nervous that I am running a little bit short, but I think if I focus on editing I could manage. I am relieved to say that Alex was a pretty good actress! I was nervous because she never does anything like this and honestly told me she didn't expect to do well but would try nonetheless. But she was really easy to work with! She listened to everything I asked and played her role well. I even got some emotion out of her... currently prepping for the Oscar nomination she will receive shortly. 

poster research!

 Hi blog! Hope you are all safe and in good health :)

SO, I wanted to get some inspiration for my postcard prior to shooting and getting the stills I need to create it.

Since my movie is in the genre of sports films, I wanted to focus on those.

    

These posters feature the main character as the focal point. With varying aesthetics, they all have the sport evidently portrayed as well, mostly through the costume choices. This is a good option for me especially because my film will be character-driven, as Alex's character development is what pushes the plot along. Additionally, I like how powerful it makes the characters look. I'm thinking a really good shot of her in front of the goal could be a simple, yet bold poster. However, it might be too simple for my taste. 

These types of posters are also an option. They show the concept of the movie (given sport) but are more focused on the aesthetic of the shot. They feel more creative to me. I think I could also do a picture of her cleats. A closeup of her cleats with the goal blurred in the background would look cool, too. 

When it comes to font choices, I think I will decide once I get the shot. But, I really like bold, strong fonts, like in the Rocky III poster. I am a fan of the powerful look of it. I also would like to keep it as simple as possible.

These posters will help generate my postcard, which I want to look like a movie poster anyways. 

Super cool idea I had because I am so awesome

 Hi guys!

I know my blogs are very much like boring filler updates right now but I'm just ~~pre production~~ so give me a little bit of time and they'll get more interesting.

I had an idea today!

SO because I'll be shooting a soccer film, obviously there will be lots of green. Like duh

I had this super cool idea though!

Like I've mentioned, my goalie takes the sport too seriously. She is very good, butttt she is very hard on herself. I want to work with colors to represent this frustration.

It's pretty obvious, but in Media Studies AS level, when we studied color theory, we learned that red represents anger and passion. The article, The Psychology of Color in Film, helped me as well.

Most of my film will be shot with normal coloration, minimal filters. (Grass is green, the sky is blue) But when, for example, she misses a save, messes up a pass, or at the moment she finds out she was not accepted to her school (if I choose to do that,) I want the screen to go red. Add a bright red filter to the shot, representing that intense feeling of frustration with herself. I think this could be a very cool stylistic choice that would spice up my piece a little. I would also want to add voiceovers during these bits, instead of the normal sound. (ex. Have her call herself an idiot, or something like "not good enough)

PROBLEMS .

 Hi guys!!

I don't know if you could tell from the blog title, but I am not in a good mood. 

I kind of am, but in reference to this project, I am not.

My mother just informed me that I will be going out of town for a good portion of next week. I leave Monday night. And I am not sure when I come back. I have to go visit family I haven't seen in over 10 years in Orlando, which is good, but what about the project??? 

I haven't even filmed yet! I guess I can't complain too much because it is my own fault for not having completed that in the first place, but still. I feel much more cramped on time now. I was supposed to have this entire week to film, as this weekend I have two games and less time. So I am stressing out.  A lot. 

The good news is that my amazing teacher has offered us an extension on our portfolio project. Previously due on the 12th, we now have until the 18th. This gives me next week to film, if I cannot get it done beforehand. Obviously, I should try, so I have more time to work on the other two components of my project. 

As for social media and the postcard, it is difficult for me to develop those without any footage. So as of now, I am just creating rough ideas and visuals for how I want to create those until I have legitimate substance. 

This whole project has really been a learning experience. I need to quit procrastinating!! It seriously is making my life so much harder. You would think that if I continue to feel so overwhelmed every time I procrastinate, I would stop procrastinating. Insanity is defined as doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. 

equipment

 hi everyone!

I plan on shooting soon soooo here is a list of the things I will be using:

• iPhone 12- I debated whether I should use my phone or my dad's Nikon camera. However, my phone's camera has amazing quality and I am much more familiar with it. I wouldn't want to waste time trying to figure out how to use a fancier camera when mine is good enough.
• Tripod for phone
• Mobile camera stabilizer (fits phone!)
• 
  
  
  
• A bunchhhh of soccer balls (Might borrow my coach's soccer bag so that I don't have to be running around after every single shot on goal)
• A couple extra teammates to shoot on my goalie
• Lighting fixtures (inside filming)
• 
  
  
  
• Color filters- These are meant to go with a separate camera, but I might try just taping them to my phone to see how it looks

I plan on filming as much as I can in one day, but if anything comes short I will come back and adjust.

group meetings #3!

hi everyone ! We had our last group meeting today which is kind of scary because that means the project is due soon ! Maybe because it’s my senior year, or because last year the pandemic began mid-project, but this years portfolio project went by muchhhhh quicker. Little bit overwhelming.

So, today we had our group meetings! Like the last couple meetings, I heard a lot of super cool ideas. I can’t wait for this project to be over so I can see what everyone else did. It’s super exciting!

I got a couple of suggestions for my project.

Somebody suggested that maybe the story closes with the goalie becoming afraid of the goal. She becomes so hyper fixated on soccer that she begins to dread it, and every time she is in goal she feels this anxiety that takes over her.

Another idea that I liked is that instead of everything leading up to her college decision, she could be rejected halfway through the piece. I think that would give it some nice structure as well. Following her rejection, she kind of falls apart and has to reevaluate her desire for the sport and her passion for life, as soccer has been the only thing she knows.

Additionally, someone said my piece reminded them of Black Swan. I really like this comparison because personally, I like to be inspired by other art when I create. I think it helps new ideas come to mind. Something I really loved about Black Swan was the use of mirrors to represent self reflection, so maybe I’ll use that.

Obviously, I wouldn't be utilizing the whole aggressive lipstick thing, but you get the gist. 

Bye for now ! :)

costume choices

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!!!

So today I will be discussing costume choices. It is a lot easier in my case because goalies and all soccer teams wear uniforms.

My goalkeeper's shirt is a bright neon green long sleeve, that contrasts the dull green of the field. Her jersey sticks out a lot, which is good because I want her to have a powerful presence. Additionally, she will wear black soccer shorts and black soccer socks. 

( I don't have the long sleeve picture so you will have to VISUALIZE!!! ) 

In the scenes in which she does not wear her uniform, (at home, etc) she will also be wearing soccer clothes, just not her goalie unfirom. I'll have her wear some tournament shirts, keeping her hair up in a ponytail and soccer shorts for her casual, off-the-field look. This will show that she does not care much about her appearance at all, as the only clothes she wears are related to soccer. She makes her whole life about soccer. She won't look too well put together as a person.

Wait oh my god this looks so mean Alex if you read this I THINK YOU LOOK GREAT HERE!! Your character will look like this but not in cute jeans, and with a much more messy ponytail and sweaty look. I think you look pretty here please don't hate me. Just picture like the soccer jersey and some shorts. 

If I include other character shots, they will be wearing plain clothing to contrast Alex. I want her to standout in the piece.

SPRING BREAK YUUUUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In order to enjoy this post at full capacity, you need to play the jersey shore music.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lFskSht2MD8

Okay good, I'm glad you listened. This song is so fun it puts me in such a hyper mood. If you didn't, you're missing out and you will NOT match the vibe of this post. 

HAPPY SPRING BREAK!!!!!!!!!!! MY LAST SPRING BREAK OF HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!

MUCH NEEDED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This past quarter beat the living h e double hockey sticks out of me. If I'm being honest, I definitely relaxed wayyyy too much once I got accepted to college because I really forgot how hectic and brutal the third quarter can be. BUT ITS SMOOTH SAILING NOW!!!!!!!!! Everything now is reviews and light work. This is probably the only class I have to put in genuine work for. But I am so excited for my spring break!!!! 

Also, this is my last break before I graduate?? What?? That's literally so weird I don't know to process it. I AM JUST KIDDING I CAN'T WAIT TO LEAVEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am not a stupid idiot and I still remember that covid exists, however I am still going to have fun!!! Lots of beach days for me. 

Okay so one small problem, though. I was PLANNING on shooting over break just because it seemed like the smartest thing to do. No school means more time to plan and prepare, more hours in the daylight, etc. However I did not realize that everyone but me apparently on my soccer team would be vacationing throughout the break, so all of our practices for the week got canceled.

Why does this matter, you ask??? Have you not been paying attention at all?? I JUST explained in a very recent blog post that I would have to film on nights where I practice so that the field is reserved for my team and I have ensured time and space to shoot. ALSO the star of my short is going out of town for a little bit BUT she needs to get tested before I see her since she traveled, which means I am NOT shooting over break. 

                        I guess I will just

wait.

This sucks a LOT but I will work through it. In a way, I can use this break to plan out my shooting even more and recharge, so I can be prepared following my 10 days of bliss. 

I just thought I would update you all on this minor setback. I plan on shooting either the week after break, or worst case the following. I would rather get it done sooner so I have more time to edit though. 

character background

Hi guys!

So for my goalie character, I wanted to keep it fairly simple when it comes to her background.

Since it is a short film and not a movie or episodic documentary, I feel like it is important to develop a character with an implied background that is easy for viewers to figure out on their own. It is a short film, so I want to spend most of it developing her character rather than just explaining her past. 

I want to make it evident that this is a girl who has been taking soccer extremely seriously for the majority of her life. She has been playing travel soccer for years now and is clearly very good.

Because she is so good, I think I'll have her be cocky on the outside; maybe she has problems with controlling her anger when she lets a goal in, etc. But deep down, this is rooted from the insecurity that she is not good enough. This fear will be explained through voiceovers probably, as we hear others from her life telling her. Perhaps it'll be coaches or her parents. That way, the audience can see the pressure put on her without having to delve too deep into her past. It's quick.

Additionally, I want to make sure my audience can see that socially, soccer has been a setback for her. This can be more implied than anything, as the goalkeeping will be a sort of metaphor for the way she acts with her relationships- she doesn't let anyone in. 

Oh my goddddddddddddddd this girl seems like a total DRAG totally the life of the party!!!

By the end of the film hopefully, SOMEONE will tolerate her because as I create her character even I want to punch her.

target audience

Hey everyone!

I've kind of been struggling with my blogs, to be honest. It's hard for me with this whole blog thing. It's hard to remember a lot. But I set reminders on my phone, so hopefully, that helps. Also, I struggle with coming up with ideas to write about. Thankfully, my super amazing and helpful teacher has put up a file with a bunch of blog topics, so that comes in handy.

Now, time to clarify my target audience:

I definitely want to gear my short film to athletes. Not just casual athletes though; people who take their sport seriously. Who see it as a lifestyle and are passionate about their sport. The whole point of my short film will be that the goalkeeper almost takes it TOO seriously, so even though anybody could enjoy it, serious athletes are more likely to genuinely understand it. 

Additionally, I'd like to have the target age range be upperclassmen in high school. This is very specific, but for good reason: sports are different once you are my age. Whether it is your intention or not, you have to consider it as a future now. A lot of people play competitively just for their youth; they don't want to go pro. Or some people know since they're 5 years old that they want to be on their national team. It's weird. But you start seeing scouts, and your teammates start sending colleges their highlights. It's hard not to avoid the subject. The goalie will be a senior in high school who wants to play for a college, so she definitely takes it much more seriously than someone who isn't playing with the intention of making a career out of it. 

As for the social class, there is no target. Anyone can enjoy this because soccer is a sport that is played anywhere; from dirt roads with a ball of made of paper to the nicest fields in rich American neighborhoods. Many of the most famous players in the world came from poverty. For example, Dani Alves from the Brazillian national was dirt poor and now he is playing for one of the best teams in the world. If the talent and commitment are there, you can make it anywhere. 

I thought about targeting the film towards girls since the soccer experience is very different for us. (We are taken less seriously, the wage gap, do I need to go on?) But I didn't really want to make this a feminist piece, so it's targeted to any gender.

group meetings #2

 hi!!!!!!!!!!!!

So we had our second group meeting today! This one went drastically better than our previous one considering I actually had an idea to talk about this time. I listened to everyone else's ideas first because I get a little shy. It was super cool to hear how creative my classmates are! I'm genuinely really looking forward to seeing everyone's project, especially since we have more of a variety of projects to choose from this year. It's also intimidating though because I feel like everyone's projects are so original. Oh well, I'm probably just overthinking. Or maybe I'm unoriginal and boring and I suck. I do not know.

So I had some help with guiding my story along.

My main problem right now is figuring out an ending to my story. I know what I want it to be about, but what will my goalie do? What solves, or doesn't solve, her conflict? How am I tying this together? 

Like I said, she becomes to project her goalie lifestyle into her life; she keeps everyone out and "blocks" everyone, only focusing on the game. 

Someone suggested that maybe she has a big tournament coming up, and to take the story in that route. As in her preparing, and then going. However, I feel like I would want to include the tournament in that case, and I can't because due to Covid, we have no tournaments right now. So it would be unrealistic because I couldn't recreate that environment without many people.

An idea I liked was her preparing for college decisions. Like maybe she wants to go to UNC for soccer, and she spends days coming up freaking out, and then in the end she doesn't get in. OR maybe she does? That'd be kind of lame though.

ORRRRRRRRRR another idea that I liked was that she decides to quit soccer. She is so obsessed with it and I can portray it in such a negative light that in the end, she decides it isn't even fun for her anymore. That could be cool. Like even though she's crazy talented, she just loses interest.

So I have to consider those last two more, I think. Time's running out though.

A classmate also suggested an editing software called davinciresolve, which I might use if I don't understand my program. But to be honest, I might end up sticking with iMovie.

That's all I have to share right now. We did all get to just chat a little, which was nice because I honestly never get to do that. Since most of us are online, we never just talk to each other randomly like this, you know? I barely get into breakout rooms and most of them are for a short assignment. We just talked about being seniors and stuff. It was nice. 

Alright, well I will be thinking lots. Many decisions to make. Ciao !

Location scouting

 Hey everyone!

SO I have been doing some super crazy and so exciting location scouting ! :/

I need to shoot at a soccer field, obviously.

I want to stay local since I do not have a car. I considered some of the fields near me, like Vista Park, right next to my highschool. Those are really well kept, but they get pretty crowded and I don't live nearby, so it would be hard to find a time where I would have consistent field space.

I also thought about Amelia Earhart park, which is beautiful. I play there a lot for tournaments and it's just such a nice park, so I'd love to shoot there. But unfortunately, I have the same issues. This one is much further, and how would I ensure the space?

The best answer was staring at me right in my stupid face. Weston Regional Park! My team practices there Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. On Thursdays, we practice at the rinks. But that is not as visually remarkable as a soccer field. I want the classic look, ya know? That would give off a much more practice vibe. Not cool.

So this is my beautiful park:

I'm probably going to shoot at field 2, as seen in the first picture. Those are turf fields, so they're better kept and have better-drawn field lines. But mostly because we already practice on those fields, so I have space ensured. Also, I don't have to make anyone drive anywhere in their free time! We'll already be there for practice anyways. Very convenient this way.

Look at me, figuring things out. How resourceful of me. What a college-ready woman! UCF is not ready.

SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Hi guys! Hope you are all happy and healthy!

So I have been thinking about the aesthetic of my movie. I want it to have some superrrrrr dope shots. Since I'm working with a lot of action scenes, I want to incorporate a lot of camera movement too!

Here's some ideas for shots I have:

• Close up of the goalkeeper's hands, saving a shot
• Close up of her feet, right as she jumps to save a shot
• Close up of her eyes with a concentrated look
• A shot of her blocking a shot, but shot from inside the goal
• Maybe shots from a low angle of my teammates shooting on her?

Please don't mind my drawing skills. I tried my hardest. Believe it or not, those are actually cleats planted on the ground, not a ballet dancer in pointe shoes. 

Those would be very fast-paced, with a lot of vivid colors, so maybe I'll work with some filtering. As you can tell, I want there to be a lot of detailed, close-up shots. I think they'd be good to set the tone of a successful goalie.

I also want shots of her messing up. Shots of her letting in goals, shots of her messing up punts. I think I will also make those fast-paced, but with either black and white or a red tint. I really want to play on her frustration and insecurities, as her self-worth will be determined by her performance in goal. I want her to have an obsession with the game. An unhealthy relationship, with her having unrealistic expectations of herself to be perfect. 

Though I am yet to develop the script, I want my film to have minimal dialogue. I want to mostly rely on the footage to develop the plot. I also want to find a really good soundtrack to back the piece. And I also think it would be cool if I recorded audio of her during a game because she is very loud and aggressive. 

Casting

 Good news!! 

So I really wanted my short film to have a really natural feel to it. I have a good amount of friends who are comfortable/good at acting that I could have asked to play my goalie. But honestly, I wanted my goalie to be played by my goalie. Pretty shocking cast right?

Her name is Alexandra Jones and she is a senior as well. We have been on the same team for like six years now, and we are super good friends. She plays for the varsity team at Cypress too! I've seen a lot of really good goalkeepers in my time playing soccer, but she takes the crown. Not because she plays for my team; we have played against some teams that are far better than we are. But she has a really raw, natural talent.

Now I'm not ranting about how amazing Alex is for the sake of you all being as in love and in awe of her as I am. I wanted to cast her for a few reasons:

1. It will feel natural- she knows what she's doing.
2. She's super talented, so I can get some amazing shots of her saves.
3. She is a good friend of mine! It's easier to ask friends for favors than strangers 
4. We are on the same team, so it won't be hard to find the time. 
• We practice on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays (Thursdays we practice in a soccer rink rather than on the field, so I don't think I'll be utilizing any footage from those nights.  I like the look of a soccer field better.) We can either stay after practice to record some or come early. If not, there are always weekends.

When I approached Alex with the idea, she was super open to it!!! It was so relieving because it helps to know that I don't have to stress about finding someone else. She told me she has no problem with me recording action shots of her whatsoever, and that she'd actually love to see them shot in an ~aesthetic~ manner. Her only concern, however, was that she is not a trained actress and never really does anything like this. 

Perhaps with a different film, this would concern me, but I think it might work in my favor. I want her character to be closed off and shy, so her discomfort with acting might be exactly what I want to portray. I  told her that since I don't have too
many details with the plot yet, and more just an idea of it, that I would let her know when I have a script so she can practice a little bit. 

Anyways, this is her! She's the super perfect amazing beautiful stunning one in the middle with the insane blue eyes: 

I plan on keeping her name as Alex. I think Alex is such a soccer name. It's perfect. 

I'll keep you guys updated!

BIG CHANGES

Hi guys.... 

So as you all know, my project hasn't been developing as much as it should be. The whole tooth idea was a bust. I never liked it, but it was the first and only bit of inspiration I had, so I ran with it. 

I reached out to my teacher, Mrs. Stoklosa, for help. We normally get most of the class to work privately on our projects, as we would in real-life class in a non-covid world. I stuck around after the meeting ended because I am in desperate need of help. I told her my idea, and addressed my concerns that it was not that interesting, would be better animated, I couldn't develop a genuine story around it, etc. She agreed with me that the tooth route was not the way to go. 

So, after some crazy rambling after about how stressed I was, she helped guide me towards a new idea. She reminded me of something I needed to be reminded about: talk about what you know. It would be much easier for me to come up with a story revolving around things I am passionate and knowledgable about. She asked me about things I am interested in, and as you might have guessed from my blogs, my response was scattered. So, we honed in on my biggest interest, soccer. I've been playing travel soccer for about 6 years now, and recreationally for even longer. It is super important to me, so it wasn't a bad idea. I had avoided soccer as a subject because I had been viewing it only from a documentary perspective. But Stoklosa reminded me that a story can come from anywhere. 

Now it was just brainstorming what I could draw from soccer. I really liked the idea of sticking with something I'm familiar with, so now its just finding a story to tell. We discussed the choice of taking an artistic route with the piece, which I think I will do. Regardless of what I do with it, I think that I could get some beautiful action shots and super cool movement shots that would really make my piece stand out. I could play with color a lot as well! I started to get excited as a lot of ideas started running through my brain. As Stoklosa continued to give me amazing advice, I felt a lot like this:

But in a good way! Like positive chaos. There's so many routes I could take this, now it's just a matter of refining it. I am planning on speaking with my teammates and seeing which would be comfortable enough to act/be filmed in my film, and additionally working to develop a solid storyline as soon as possible. I left my meeting with Stoklosa feeling inspired, which was so nice. And not to be all gross and emotional, but it was really nice seeing that some teachers actually care about their students' success and pay attention to them. Its comforting. Mrs. Stoklosa when you read this, you are super awesome and my favorite teacher ever I love you!! Okay for the rest you, I love you too, don't worry. I will be back with more awesome ideas! Things are changing for the better! Ciao <3 

 

I have run into trouble.

 Hello. 

That was a more somber greeting than normal, I hope you noticed. It's because I am in a horrible mood, to be honest. So that idea I had, about the teeth? That wasn't even an idea really, just a bunch of small possible concepts I could work with? But it was all I had? You guys know what I'm talking about??

IT DOESN'T EVEN MATTER!!! AT ALL!!!! BECAUSE GUESS WHAT???? IT SUCKS!!! SO BAD!!!!!!!!!!

I have come to some realizations. There are a lot of possible obstacles with this whole quirky tooth concept I had:

1. I do not have A CHILD!!! How am I supposed to create a cute little short film about losing teeth when the people who lose teeth are CHILDREN?? I am the youngest sibling. I do not necessarily have the resources to cast a child either. Most of my friends don't even have little siblings that I could even work with. 
2. How am I supposed to produce this? A tooth is SO SMALL. Like it's minuscule. What was I planning on doing? A voiceover for the super tiny tooth? Working with the distance of objects from the camera like they did in The Hobbit/ Lord of the Rings? Who do I think I am??? Also, how is it going to move? Stop motion? A little string? Come on Juli. 
3. Following #2, this piece would really only work well if it were animated. Here's the thing, though: I do not have the time, NOR the talent, to animate. So there goes that. 

So, what have we learned here? 

This is a horrible idea and I need to trash it. I would say that I overestimated my time and skill set, but that isn't even the case. It wasn't blissful ignorance or confidence in my abilities. I was honestly just thrilled at the fact that I had somewhat of an idea, finally. 

Now, I must find another idea, soon. This is me right now:

Fun fact: This can be applied to this project AND my life in general! How super hilarious is that! 

It'll be okay though. I'm gonna figure this out. I promised you all a very cool project, and a very cool project you will get. 

Goodbye. 

brainstorming !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi blog! I have to say, things are looking slightly better but still not good enough. I can't help but think that my frustration due to the lack of a solid idea for my short film is not helping me. I just feel mad that I haven't struck a pot of gold in my brain and pulled out this incredible idea out of nowhere. Lots of self-doubt going on right now but trying to push past it because my entire blog cannot consist of self-deprecating humor. That would be mildly concerning for my audience.

Anyways, I've been doing some brainstorming! Yay! It's a stressful process, but I know only good things come out of it. I was talking to my dad about this project. He is a director, and unlike me, comes up with a lot of ideas for short stories in his free time. He just normally does nothing with them, as he can't execute every idea that pops into his head. (Luckily, my integrity is intact as I have forced myself to come up with an original idea.) I told my dad about my lead into the whole tooth idea, and we began bouncing ideas off of each other. I've always liked to brainstorm with other people, as I think that other people's ideas can always provide inspiration. 

So, something I really liked was the idea of shooting from the point of view of the tooth. This could be done with a lot of shots from a low angle, maybe including parents comforting a crying child, or a pillow being lifted off the bed as someone checks to see whether the tooth is still there. I think that could be cute. 

Or, I could go in the direction of the tooth fairy. Maybe the tooth fairy is this totally unconventional character (Think "Tooth Fairy" featuring Dwayne the Rock Johnson, 2010) 

I could also do a tooth waiting room! I also really liked this idea. Say the tooth is waiting to be accepted into whatever tooth database, and the receptionist is all like "Sorry, we have no records of blah blah" and the tooth goes into a total crisis because he suddenly apparently doesn't exist. I don't know, saying it aloud makes it sound a little dumb.

Maybe the tooth character is broken, and he is running around, trying to find the other pieces of him? Maybe this tooth is in a zoom call because the waiting room is not functioning mid-pandemic? Honestly, scratch that. I'm sick of pandemic humor. Those Progressive commercials are getting on my last nerve. 

The tooth in zoom call mid-pandemic.

My mom also kept all my teeth that I lost as a child. She insists this is not a creepy thing to do because "baby teeth are cute and she is my mom and wants to keep memories of my childhood," but it's giving me some weird vibes. But I could include a shot with that at some point! My dad suggested that sometimes it is easier to develop a story starting with its ending, but with all these possible ideas, it is hard for me to picture an ending.

I swear I'm trying you guys. Bear with me, please.

 

I have somewhat of an idea!

 Hello everyone!! I bring good news! I have been inspired slightly!

Okay so the past weeks have consisted of me racking my brain for any sort of creativity. Multiple times a day, I've tried drawing inspiration from the most random things, in the hopes that one would create at least a semi-decent premise for my short film. While I am not convinced this will be my final idea, I think I will just have to run with it because I have a deadline and I am getting way too far into this project without even having a plot.

So, my brother came down for the weekend to celebrate mine and my dad's birthdays. We were looking for some documents of his for his university when we found a bunch of old drawings from when we were kids and other old items to reminisce about. We found a letter he had written to the tooth fairy the first time he had ever lost a tooth. 

This led me to think about creating a short story about the tooth fairy. I think it would be super cute if I took this in a childish direction. Maybe "Toy Story" inspired, as in what happens with the teeth when humans aren't watching. I know this is not the most solid idea yet, but it is the closest to an idea that I have gotten. Any inspiration at this point has to be pushed along. I will be back when this idea is further developed. So far this blog is not as awesome as it could be, so my apologies. 

Group Meetings (except not really because I'm still alone in my bedroom)

Hi everyone! Hope your week isn't feeling as long as mine!!

It's my birthday today!! I am 18 years old!! Everything is good except I was expecting to wake up a year older and with an idea for my short film. Unfortunately, I only woke up a year older. I feel a lot like this:

On the brighter side of things, today we had our group meetings. I'm not attending school so I was able to do this from the comfort of my bed. My teacher, Mrs. Stoklosa, put us in breakout rooms. I took notes from the meeting on my phone:

While it was kind of hard to share that much in this meeting considering I do not have an idea of what to do yet. It was kind of comforting to hear that some of my classmates didn't have an idea yet either, though. I feel better, especially considering that I know the less I force it, the better the idea will be. Obviously, I have to force it a little though, considering this project is due in like a month and a half?? That is so soon oh my god. I'm not even kidding just typing that out hit me like a bus. WOW. Okay anyways, I did learn some good things today! A classmate suggested a website called shortoftheweek.com. This should help bring some inspiration, I hope. I also got the idea of creating a pros and cons list when debating ideas for my short film. This will be especially efficient for me because I am insanely indecisive and struggle to find the benefits in almost every single decision I ever make. I also realized I need to focus on my editing, as I don't really know what I'm doing! I have a school computer that has Adobe Premiere Pro, which is a really good program that I honestly do not know how to use. Last year, I was not in charge of editing in my group. I used a program called WeVideo to edit my CCR, which was simple enough to use. My plan is to attempt to use Premiere and see if I can get a hang of it; if not, WeVideo it is. I am also planning on setting up a calendar for myself, mostly because I procrastinate sooooooooooo much. I think that will help keep me on schedule. 

Other than that, I spent most of the meeting battling my internal raging jealousy for my classmates that seemed to be much more prepared than I was. I'm trying not to start freaking out about not having an idea yet, but I am failing miserably. Hopefully my next post I will return with the most awesome idea that will blow your heads off. Ciao!! 

Stranded!!

 Hey guys! So remember I told you I was going on vacation? I came to North Carolina for the weekend with my boyfriend and his family to go snowboarding for my birthday. Honestly, I had a lot of fun. But I was kind of expecting this drastic change in location to punch me in the face with a huge, groundbreaking idea for my short film. Maybe like a cute little winter-themed idea? It is crazy how it didn't work this way and I still feel blocked. 

To make matters even better, I missed my flight! So, now I am writing this blog for you all on my phone at 1 in the morning, on the cold, cold floor of the airport. Perhaps I will make my short story about an idiot girl who arrives at the airport 10 minutes late and has to pay an extra $100 for a flight back a day later, only to end up getting murdered by her parents when she gets home. 

Just kidding! That is too morbid for my taste. I apologize if my blogs are a little boring right now. I promise I'll have an idea for you soon. 

For now, here are some obstacles I have narrowed down:

• I am leaning officially towards the fantasy genre
• I will probably end up being the main actor in my short film
• While I don't love to act, I know that it will be harder to find someone in covid times. I also don't want to have to rely on someone else; they could be a bad actor, flake on me, etc.
• I want to get my shooting done before the end of this month, hopefully. That leaves me with plenty of time to edit in case I am not good at it. 

Also, I think we have group meetings coming up in class soon. Maybe I will get some inspiration from my peers, or at least some tips I could apply later. 

Inspiration!

 Hello to all my beautiful and amazing blog readers! Hope you guys are having a good weekend!

So I bring some bad news. I am still uncertain what to make my short film about. It's kind of stressing me out because I don't want to fall behind, but I am staying optimistic. I'm currently freezing my butt off in the cold so I am hoping some inspiration is drawn from my misery. Most artists create their best art from pain! I will not be an exception. 

To keep me productive, I've been researching some short films. I still am not set on a genre either, so I decided to focus on short films that told a story well. Here are some examples:

If Anything Happens I Love You

This is a heartbreaking short film about parents who struggle with their grief after losing their daughter to a school shooting. While I wouldn't create an animated film, nor do I want to create a sad film, this piece tells a story very well. It creates an emotional connection with the audience, which is something I would like to do as well. (to a lesser extent- this is a sensitive subject) Even though it is short, through the use of flashbacks and a montage of the daughter growing up, they fit an entire childhood in the piece. The story is developed well and I hope that I can create something with a functioning timeline.

Piper

This is a really cute short film! It inspired me mostly in the fact that it has a super interesting yet insanely simple plot. It is just about a little baby bird trying to manage life on the beach, but you still find yourself super attached and drawn in. This showed me that my short film doesn't have to be this super crazy intricate idea, but rather something I know people will watch. 

Did you miss me??

Hi everyone!! It's been a while since I last posted for you guys. But I am officially back and ready to start my portfolio project for A level!!

So as of right now, I am a little stuck. I have decided I want to do the short film package, but I'm not entirely sure what my film would be about, or even what genre I want to do. This weekend I will be going on a trip to North Carolina to ski, so hopefully, my traveling brings some inspiration. 

For now, I am certain of a few things:

• I do not want to create a horror film
• I am leaning towards fantasy/drama 
• Maybe even a psychological thriller? This feels like a stretch, and I would only do so if I came up with a really good idea.

I am determined to produce something for you all that is 10 times better than my previous portfolio assignment. As you may recall, I dropped the ball a little. To be honest, I was struggling with my mental health and didn't prioritize this project the way I should have, and the pandemic did not help much. I decided to work alone this year because this way, I am forced to rely on myself only and I know that kind of pressure will only motivate me more. 

I am going to try to rack my brain for ideas for my short film. Hopefully, I think of something soon. I shall leave you all in suspense.